September 28, 2004

Maybe they should put a leash on him

(Unrelated title) So I went to work today, early. Which means I went to sleep last night, early. It was an odd sleep, maybe because I had slept past noon that day, or because I had to force my mind to save its thoughts for the next day, or maybe.. who knows. Anyway I slept lightly and woke easily. (never mind I fell back asleep unintentionally - I forgot to stay awake, waking up early isn't habit yet.) I felt like I was barely on the surface of dreams. Time didn't pass correctly either, I'd close my eyes and open them two hours later, and then the next morning. One moment was hours before the next and lasted no time at all.

Big change from the crazy winter dream I had the other night, the kind of dream that keeps me sleeping because my alarm will go off and I'll want to see what happens so I go back to sleep. I was told that was odd, being able to return to a dream. All my life... scratch that. As long as I can remember, I've been able to sort of watch a dream like a movie. I'm still part of it and I do things and things happen but part of me is dreaming and the other part knows fully that it is a dream and as if it was reading a good book it wants to know what's happening next.

I was in a lucid dream about a year ago (to be honest I don't really remember when it was, or what it was even about - just that I was in my loft bed at my old apartment.) where instead of deciding to wake up (which I normally do for some reason) or fly around doing what ever I want, I just decided to play the dream, explore my subconscious. I kept waking up, not completely but I moved from subconscious thought to conscious thought and the dream would fade from me, so I'd have to move back again.

I love my subconscious.

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